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Archive for the ‘Pusilanimous Politics’ Category


Spying Pigeons in the Middle East

By EliKen on Tuesday, February 21st, 2012 | No Comments

Here in the top secret offices of The Curmudgeon, we are constantly on the lookout for spies. I am particularly suspicious of bugs, expecting them to be little robotic creatures equipped with cameras and recording equipment. This is just the type of corporate espionage some of our competitors would engage in, such as the site [...]

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Man Gets Two Years For Rap Lyrics Posted on MySpace

By EliKen on Sunday, February 19th, 2012 | No Comments

  Here in the friendly confines of the Curmudgeon offices, we are constantly surfing the web looking for tasty morsels to bring to you, our readers. Naturally, we love to point out foibles, inconsistencies and the outrageous, but we’re not exactly looking to throw people in jail. Not so the police who surf sites such [...]

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U.S. To Build a $1 Billion London Embassy – With a Moat!

By EliKen on Friday, January 27th, 2012 | No Comments

Here in the fantasy offices of The Curmudgeon, we like to dream about our new world headquarters. I say “dream,” because we can never actually afford to build it, but then we don’t have the American taxpayers to foot the bill. Not so for the U.S. Government, who can build a $1 Billion embassy with [...]

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Countries Battle in Fierce Sports Competition: Egg Throwing

By EliKen on Saturday, January 14th, 2012 | No Comments

Here in the athletic offices of The Curmudgeon, many of the office staff are engaged in sports. It is unlikely that anyone is good enough to compete professionally, including yours truly, Crusty. But now an event comes in which even I might compete. The event takes place in Swaton England. This is the sixth time [...]

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PETA Picks Apart Pudgy Porcine People

By EliKen on Tuesday, January 3rd, 2012 | No Comments

Here in the lush digs of The Crusty Curmudgeon, all staff must be animal lovers, and people are encouraged to bring their dogs with them. There is doggie day-care, a dog park and a dog agility course. So you would think we would support PETA. Sometimes, we do, and other times we want to pick [...]

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Offencive Doc Bottoms Aspray Infomercial For Smelly Butt Banned

By EliKen on Thursday, December 29th, 2011 | No Comments

Here in the comfortable confines of The Curmudgeon office, I may publicly state that I detest infomercials, but secretly I admire the “advertising business” side of them, the product ambush on your fears, insecurities, anxieties, too-small or too-large body parts, greed, hopes, and dreams. I have been known to become mesmerized by a particularly good [...]

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Obama Sends Churchill Bust Packing and Rihanna’s Face Gets Busted

By EliKen on Thursday, December 8th, 2011 | No Comments

Here in the dialectic but not polemical offices of The Curmudgeon, we are amused at the hubub over President Obama’s returning to England a bust of Winston Churchill. The bronze of the former British Prime Minister by Sir Jacob Epstein, worth hundreds of thousands of pounds if it were ever sold on the open market, [...]

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Saudi’s Ask United Nations For Aid – Say What?

By EliKen on Saturday, June 11th, 2011 | No Comments

Here in the opulent and ostentatious office of The Curmudgeon, we are, financially speaking, well off. This is not because of the money we make in our endeavors, but what we have made I have invested wisely. We own one of the largest oil fields in the world and I have invested in properties both [...]

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